Finally i'm back to my blog! So much things happened during 2013 - 2014 for me. It was a tough road those times. I had to stand up all by myself to go through everything each & everyday.
Had those times that when he left, i broke down into pieces. Escaping from reality that i have a daughter & she was tying my freedom. A week after, i realize i shouldn't escape it. When i had her, i was the one who insist of giving birth & not abort it.
It's been long that things happened & now i shall shut it down. But right now, i hope i had found the one that could really not make me experience back the same things anymore. Learn from those pains. Grow from pains.
Single mum isn't easy for us woman but if we do not stay strong for them, who will help you to be strong for them? No one will do that for you. Single mummies ain't someone for you guys to play with nor flirt with. We've been through more things than you when you haven't been through the next phase of life. Pains, suffers, sacrifice. Have you guys been through all these?
Single mum like us will still have some phobia of relationship which links to trust & faith. Different mums will go through different stages of experience. Husbands may flirt, fuck around, affair. But we woman couldn't possibly fully push the blame to the man. We have to questions our-self too. Why would this relationship nor marriage turn this way? What are the causes between both?
And now, i have met this guy whom accepted me with a kid. I appreciate him that he could accept it. Not all man could accept a woman with kid. He may not be the father of my child, but i just hope his love would be true towards us. There're still some phobia in me to counter it. So i have to buck up to overcome!
Lastly, Alyssa my darling daughter. I hope in future you grow up, you wouldn't blame mummy. I was unable to give you a complete family as your dad has left. But i hope you'll understand why we made the decision to divorce. Be a good girl & grow up healthy! Mummy love you!
PS: Baby, in future any insecurities nor anything, could we possibly work it out together? I need someone who is able to work anything out together instead of avoiding it or pushing the blames. We're old enough to face the fact of anything that hit us. I can't promise you that we will have a perfect relationship. However, if you're trying, i'm staying. I wanna be the one to change your temper & attitude so that it really shows i'm the one you need. If i'm unable to change it, then maybe this is fate that we will end it. Let's work hard & work towards whatever your dreams is! I love you bi. Thanks for loving us both! <3 font="">
Bellelina & Erik
